September 1st marks the 6th anniversary of the day we first met our daughter Tammy-Li.
It was hot, which is normal for Nanning, Guang Xi Autonomous Region, People’s Republic of China. I remember all of the Dad’s were wearing shorts, and all the Mom’s wore shorts or sun-dresses. Nanning is on a latitudinal par with Cancun, Mexico, so palm trees lined the streets and there were jungles just outside the city limits.
The journey from Toronto to Nanning was both exhilarating and exhausting, with stopovers in Vancouver and Shanghai. The Chinese domestic flight from Shanghai to Nanning convinced us we were “not in Kansas, er, I mean Canada, anymore”. The plane ride itself was not unlike our venture into the adoption experience – embarking on either required a phenomenal leap of faith.
This weekend we are hosting a “day at the beach” – a get together for the families with whom we had the pleasure of sharing a life-altering experience. We meet with our Adoption Group at least twice each year. It’s always a thrill to see how the families are growing. Three of the couples have adopted more than once, and I can honestly say, Alex and I would not hesitate to do the same if we were younger.
However, reality being what it is, we are more than satisfied with our family. (***This is me, knocking on wood as I make this statement!) Our two biological sons and our precious daughter have brought us so much more joy than we could have ever hoped!
The most surprising thing of all, though, is not how much we love our daughter. To know her is to love her, and it’s impossible for us to imagine our lives without her.
No, the biggest surprise for us was how close we have become to our fellow-adoptive-parents! Those men and women, those comrades on the journey that changed our lives so dramatically – it is very much as if we were all in the maternity ward together, cheering each other on through childbirth!
Not only did we share in the Adoption Ceremony, which was very moving, but we also spent two intense weeks together in close quarters! We ate together, toured together by bus, swam, shopped, laughed and cried together in a tiny forced community that could not help but bond us for life.
Amazingly, even though we hailed from very different walks of life, we found there were many commonalities we shared, and still do.
The greatest of these, of course, is our daughters – those precious flowers of China, who have so bravely made the journey together from one world to another.
It is our sincere hope they will be “forever mei-mei’s”, forever sisters of the soul.
And that, in a nutshell, is the main reason we come together!
Donna Carrick, August 5, 2009
